Friends, there are two things I want right now: an iPhone 6 Plus and a sweet fanny pack keep it in. Forget little iPhones. I want a nice big screen so I can read books everywhere I go. At the mall, at the movies, at the laundromat–wait, I don’t go to the laundromat anymore…

Not the point.

The point is I want a nice, big iPhone, and I only see one problem: where to store it. The small iPhone fits so comfortably in my jeans pocket, but a bigger iPhone might not, and according to a reports, there have been a few cases of it bending.

That won’t do.

My solution is simple: wear a fanny pack. Forget purses with their need to be held. I want a fanny pack that I can fill with essential items (cash, cards, keys, phone, hand sanitizer, feminine products), attach to my waist, and forget about.

Fanny packs mean business. No hands. Well, except for the initial strap on. And then the strap off.

Did the temperature just go up in here? I think so! Try making love wearing a purse. That sounds complicated. But with a hands free fanny pack, no problem.

Fanny packs are sexy.

Right? Right?!?!

Well, in this Friday fantasy they are. If I could resurrect one maligned fashion accessory, it would be the fanny pack. Because I like to keep my friends close and my credit cards even closer.

What fashion accessory would you make trendy again?